I have avoided writing lately. I havent had words to say. Nothing positive has happened from all the documents that have been sent to different lawyers. Although everyone, lawyers and immigration people say that it should all be fine, no one can give me anything in writing so far to take back in my defense. My time is running out on my referral of the little boy I have been praying for and planning to be my son. So I was discouraged. The sickness and death of many adopted kids or orphans that I have been praying for and then the Russian ban on adoptions to the US completely defeated me. But, that is exactly where the Father of lies wants me to be. He is the destroyer. Today God used many things to set me straight again. Some thoughts from today before I go to sleep are.
1. Time to do good is now. Satan is destroying and it is not ok to sit by and watch and give up in defeat.
1 John 3:16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. 17 If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? 18 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.
and in 2 Peter I was reminded that God is creator over all and will punish the evil doers. I can not allow myself to be overwhelmed by evil.
2. God is not subject to Satans schemes. He is able to do anything.
1John 4:4 Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.
I do believe that God is able to make this adoption happen still, but more than that I am stepping out of fear and discouragement and trusting that He has brought me to this place for His purpose. His purposes are good. He will see me through. He is in control, so it is ok. Ok to let go, again. Ok to not know, still. Ok to hope, longer. And ok to hurt, He is here.