I am not alone.  Not alone in feeling small, insignificant, unable, scared.  In fact I am in the company of a many who went before me. Who experience the ridicule of others, being misunderstood and rejected.  I am not able to do this.  I have no guarantees.  I am not doing this for attention, to feel good or to complete myself.  I am not crazy.  I serve and love a God who is BIG, who loves BIG, who sacrifices BIG, who has BIG plans and BIG promises.  He is always enough and always at work.  Some verses keep encouraging me and being brought to mind.  Also I have a responsibility to care for my children.  I know that and more importantly God knows that.  I will always care for ALL the children that God gives me.  Ultimately He is the one who provides for each of us.  It is NEVER irresponsible to follow God, no matter what it "costs" you.
Ex 3:7-12

Then the LORD said, “I have surely seen the affliction of my people who are in Egypt and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters. I know their sufferings, and I have come down to deliver them out of the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land to a good and broad land, a land flowing with milk and honey, to the place of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Amorites, the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites. And now, behold, the cry of the people of Israel has come to me, and I have also seen the oppression with which the Egyptians oppress them. Come, I will send you to Pharaoh that you may bring my people, the children of Israel, out of Egypt.” But Moses said to God, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?” He said, “But I will be with you, and this shall be the sign for you, that I have sent you: when you have brought the people out of Egypt, you shall serve God on this mountain.”
(Exodus 3:7-12 ESV)

Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”
Deut. 31:6


Of David. The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?
Psalm 27:1


And the angel of the LORD appeared to him and said to him, “The LORD is with you, O mighty man of valor.”  And Gideon said to him, “Please, sir, if the LORD is with us, why then has all this happened to us? And where are all his wonderful deeds that our fathers recounted to us, saying, ‘Did not the LORD bring us up from Egypt?’ But now the LORD has forsaken us and given us into the hand of Midian.”  And the LORD turned to him and said, “Go in this might of yours and save Israel from the hand of Midian; do not I send you?” And he said to him, “Please, Lord, how can I save Israel? Behold, my clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my father’s house.” And the LORD said to him, “But I will be with you, and you shall strike the Midianites as one man.”

Judges 6:12-16

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.   Matthew 6:33

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:19-21

He did this so that all the peoples of the earth might know that the hand of the LORD is powerful and so that you might always fear the LORD your God."  Joshua 4:24